I checked the meaning and it says
“of little value or importance” but nothing gives more insights on life than
normal mundane living.
First tale: Thangam, my cook, was
scrupulously duty conscious in the first 9 years of service. The last 12 months
has been a horror. She entered my
services in January 2010 when life was throwing all kinds of bouncers at me. I
was unemployed the whole of 2010, I was boiling inside after a woman dumped me
in October of 2009, I still had fantasies of publishing fame. Thangam is a
taciturn character to the friendly Meera, the earlier cook. We took more than a
year to speak more than two sentences. In the initial years I was content that
my food problems were fixed. Thangam is quiet German efficiency.
I
am very liberal as an employer - I give 4-5 days a leave a month without
question. I also give my cooks the use of the ration card from which they get 4
kgs of sugar, cooking oil and other pulses at subsidized rates. Thangam is now
60 and fast ageing. For one who was never late by more than 15 minutes in the
first 9 years of service the last 12 months have been a horror show. She takes
more leaves than I can digest, irregular timings that rattles my cage. If you
are supposed to come by 9 am, 30 minutes late is acceptable but not 11:00. This
happened 3-4 times this month. Her reason is using this prime cooking time for her physiotherapy sessions for a sprain in the arms. This sloppiness makes me feel like reducing her bonus from 50 k to 20 k, a gratuitous gesture, as I shift to a new residence when dispensing with her service. What pains me
that she just does not care or give an ear to my censures. I tell her gently, “You
have worked for 10 years here and you have earned the right to take as many leaves as you wish. But please don’t promise to come at 8:30 am
and call me at 10:00 saying you’ll be an hour late. Please remember that there is a person waiting
for breakfast and any delay after 10:00 is rats in my stomach.” She just doesn’t get this simple message soaked in thick layers of SELF-CENTEREDNESS (Thangam has a rich selfish vein of selfishness). If I am having a cardiac arrest and were to call Thangam for help, sure she will respond but not if she is attending a physiotherapy session. There is an insight that
Thangam taught me unwittingly: How much ever you are absorbed in your work or physiotherapy sessions,
please spare a thought to the other person. Don’t be so selfish and self-centered as to earn the wrath of a very hungry man.
Second Insight: One of my pet
scratching emotional wound is "try to hurt my siblings" with couple
of stinker mails annually. My grouse against both my sisters is they have not
included me in festivities for 3 decades knowing full well that I am a loner
and zilch family support. I tried hammering in their heads that they owe me a
certain hospitality but a drilling machine to make holes on a concrete
slab would have been easier than putting any noble thoughts on their heads. I also realized that I get no support from them when I
am sick (both my sisters never visit me in decades, so absorbed they are in
their pre-occupations with their husbands and sons and daughter-in-laws and
grandsons that a poor brother can’t fetch even a fleeting glance of concern).
Normally
I write a stinker mail to them around Diwali for a yearly ritual and include in the "cc" their kids and their samadhis as my outrage and shaming them to people they hold near and dear.
Yesterday I was tempted to write "both of you have such stone hearts that
it will do you good to work in a crematorium. Your task would be collect the
bones and ashes after the bodies are cindered to ashes. A few days work and you
will realize the wealth and flesh are ephemeral." I kept debating in my
mind before this thought stopped me in the tracks: In this world there is so
much misery and sorrow, let no one - however much I am provoked - suffer on
account of my words or actions. It's a nice thought to remember, so I repeat: I
will not do a thing to wipe out sorrow in others caused by million myriad
factors but I will not be the cause of someone's sorrows.
Third tale: When I started the TOI job
in February, 2007 I was asked by the HR department to open a salary account at
HDFC bank which I promptly did. Though I have a savings account at SBI, HDFC
has been my main operative account since then. When I sold an apartment last
December and those people saw 1 crore in my account, the VP (investment)
invited himself to my residence. We had elaborate exchanges on my risk appetite
and expected rates of interest. Those blokes drew up an investment plan that to
my rank amateur eyes looked hollow and out to suck me. For instance, they were
giving me a 7% interest on Fixed Deposits when the outside market gives 8%. So
I told the man in suits, “Thanks for the trouble. I will manage my funds
myself.” My thinking was simple: It is better that I risk losing my monies out
of my own steam than get someone who will tell me after a year and in the
meanwhile enjoy fat salaries and foreign vacations signing up dumb goats like
me.
Last
month I sought an appointment with their relationship manager asking for an
overdraft facility or a home loan. They simply refused despite me having 10-15
lacs parked in my savings accounts at any given point in time. I wrote to HDFC Bank CEO on the level of
pathetic service and the branch manager called me saying, “Can I come and meet
you at your residence?” The lady did not as much take any initiative to meet me
in 12 years of banking that a simple complaint mail to the CEO got her jumping out
her seat.
In the meanwhile my
builder Mr. Mugudavel, an enterprising man, urged me for a home loan to consummate the transaction as quickly as possible. He banks with HDFC,
Kottivakkam branch while I bank at Besant Nagar. He requested those people to
contact me. Those chaps visited me, saw all my documents and are now willing to
give me a home loan which makes my life incredibly easy. The insight here
is simple: Those who have known me for a
decade just don’t care while a stranger sees merit in my case. The
Kottivakkam team is speed-rushing my application and for once I thank them of
their competence and decision making process.
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